Continue On...

Well... it's been a while since I've written my last blog and I suppose it's time to write another one.

Over the last couple of days after my surgery, I have been reading my blogs and it occurred to me that most of my topics were glum and sad in nature, if not written in bitterness. (In case anybody would ask or is even interested at all --- I have had a surgery that requires me to put a halt to my "regular" event-happy routine -- as if that can stop me! My surgery went pretty well as promised by my doctor. A suspicious polyp that seemed to have no right to belong where it was found, had been removed. Anyway, doc said he'll let me know the findings on my next visit which, unfortunately (or fortunately -- depending on how you want it to be) is not until September 22. I am on short term disability (again, fortunately or unfortunately) until "supposedly" September 21 --- but I kinda feel guilty coz other than little bleedings and the accompanying stinging pain, I'm ok. I've lost the annoying dizziness and nauseating headaches -- which is a withdrawal symptom from one of my regular medications, which I cannot take whilst I am taking ENDOCET [pain killer made of acetaminophen and oxycodone hydrochloride]). I am not allowed to drive nor have any outdoor activities for 7 days after the surgery (yeah right! Like that can stop me) and no lifting (as if I am doing heavy lifting, much more cleaning LoL LoL). I have been following doctor's orders -- no driving ... hmmm

Anyway, going back to my blogs... the fact that they were written as if in despair, is true. They were written in despair! What better sentiment would motivate you other than those that carry strength and have had a heavy impact in your life. And most of those times in my life, the emotions were nothing but of heavy load.

Perhaps I am one who you can call mawkishly susceptible to the negative sentiments. One with an upheaving seduction to sorrow. Oh but do not mistake this for an inclination to self-pity. Far from that. Think of it as finding solitude in the bareness of feeling. Because the emptiness will bring nothing but that. Emptiness. Ironically void of emotion.

So I sit here with nothing but a desire to write; though I could not find anything to write about. I am just compelled to put into words this need to write. And write I will... even if it doesn't make any sense.

So what have I been up to lately? Ugh. Nothing productive. Just lame. So far I've watched, after my surgery, at least 40 movies from NETFLIX -- from comedies to drama to horror flics (that's why I have been sleeping with lights on AHAHAHAHA). But it's good though. I feel like stepping into another world everytime I watch a movie. Surreal. Indeed entertaining and a truly good way to kill time. It stimulates your mind to fill in the gaps and answer the questions provoked by the synopsis. I used to not like watching movies (from a theatre) because I find it to be a waste of time. (I still don't often watch movies from a theatre. I do home movies!). I cannot seem to understand the difference between watching from a theatre and from home. It must be the huge screen and the technology of sound effects, not to mention the popcorn that cost a week's lunch money!

So much for that. Now I'm hungry. LoL. What else is new? I'm always hungry. Oh but it's 11:31AM. Just about time for lunch. But I'm going to a BBQ today at 3:00. Labor Day BBQ. I should save my appetite, you think? Nah. Unless I want to turn into a monstrous bitch, I might as well go get something to eat.