Friend? Really?

When we honestly ask ourselves which person in our lives means the most to us, we often find that it is those who, instead of giving advice, solutions, or cures, have chosen rather to share our pain and touch our wounds with a warm and tender hand. Henri Nouwen.

That is a real friend. A real friend laughs with you, not at you. A real friend stabs you in the front, not at the back. A real friend will find time just to sit with you and share your darkest hour.

On the other hand, when you get even the slightest feeling of betrayal from somebody who calls himself a friend, that is a sham.

How hard is it (or how easy) to recognize the sham from the real friends? You don't have to be a rocket scientist to tell the difference. It is all in the way of how one gets overcome with greed and envy, that by putting you down, it gives them the edge of being above you. That is your sham friend. In layman's term: Conspirator. Backstabber. Gossip-mongrel. One who fabricates stories in order to pull you down because they feel intimidated by your superiority. All they feel is contempt and envy. They use this as a shield to hide their weaknesses and the need to be needed.
A recent incident, perhaps, will give you a clearer understanding between real friends and the "not real" friends. It cost me a great deal of wasted effort to accommodate the alter-feelings, but it helped me draw the line.

I am upset.

Why?

Because the circus came to town and engaged my services, oblivious of the fact that I will be fed to the lions! Hah. Stupid me.

I shouldn't do this because I know I'm only going to make a greater fool of myself. But I suppose the means will justify the end or the end will justify the means - or however that is written. Ranting is the only way I can rid myself of this rage that is, at this very moment, eating me up. So bear with me...

Let me start by telling you a story. There once was this homeless boy who knocked at my door begging to be fed for he was hungry for friends. I took him in and clothed him with compassion. I gave him what he needed - acceptance to a society that once cowed him from being acknowledged. As this boy learned the tricks of the trade and grew accustomed to the rules of the house, he started to think for himself. He wanted more of what he had - perhaps more than what he can knowingly handle. So I granted him that wish and gave him the power to run the house in my behalf. But little did I know that this conniving ingrate will taint my domain with his
callow tactics by turning things into a theatrical hubbub. Let's call that DRAMA.

He played the role of the genuine samaritan when his intention was purely to draw attention to himself. Oh... that wasn't enough for him. He then swayed people into incriminating scenes just to get to the spotlight and then turned around to act like the champion of the depraved. And the drama began. Drama after drama after drama. Ah. What irony!

And so the story goes that I had to put things back in order. I cut him off of the limelight. When he realized that his minutes of fame was over, he turned sour. So pungent he became... that he put together bits and pieces of frivolous allegations, strove to make it known to the public (ahh... the advantages of FACEBOOK!), and hoped to flush me down the drain.

Now you ask: why would I let a birdbrained nitwit affect me to the point that I had to stoop down to his level just to get even? Let's just say he caught me during PMS! (Ladies: ya'll know that when PMS hits the brain, all sorts of nasty things can come out of our mouths)

For those of you who don't know me too well, nor have known me at all, you will, perhaps, put some thought into this and make a judgment call: "should I stay or should I go?". That's up to you. You are, by no means, stuck to stay in this group. Leave or stay as you please. I only ask that if you decide to leave, get the facts straight. Because one thing that I cannot live with is a blemished reputation, especially if it is caused by contempt and envy.

And for those who know me too well - drama or no drama... we gotta keep "kroaking"; because after all, that's what keeps us together! ain't it?