Hello It's Me Again

Let's face it. Life is boring without its drama. Life itself, indeed, IS drama.

Drama is our feelings reenacted. Drama is not only about woes and grief and lamentation. Drama is also about joy and fear and longing and surprise... everything that we feel. But what makes it dramatic is the conflict built into it.

Let's leave it at that because I am not writing about drama. I am writing about the drama within the drama. Get my drift?

For a while now I've been fighting against the drama of my life. You know...  the things we call stress. I secluded myself from the outside because it felt safe to stay in the inside. Each time I try to feel the outside, I find myself battling the hurdles that lurk out there.  And so... I go back to the safety of my shell. 

However, it is not until now that I realize there is no difference between the inside and the outside.  What is inside is exactly the same as outside.  No. Let me rephrase that. What is inside is hurtful than the outside.

Why?

Because outside, where the drama is exposed and luxuriously laid out for our indulgement, there is the ability to interact. There are choices. We can think and think and think... and then act upon those thoughts. With a little luck, the drama might go away.  If not... oh well.  Life goes on.

On the other hand... Inside... all we can do is think. Nothing more. Inside, although we believe (or try to believe), that no harm will befall us, theer is nothing we can do. We are entrapped in this box made up of the thoughts from the outside. And what do we think about? What else but the drama we are eluding from from the outside. 

Back to earth.

Today I feel alive. (Hang on... Did I die?)
The senses from which I have alienated myself from, are now all back to embrace me. The feelings are back in action.  I am happy. I am sad. I am angry. I am excited. I am surprised. I am bewildered.

What am I trying to say? Really... what is my point?

Nothing.

I just wanted to write. Is that a crime? (Hah! gotcha!)

Well... Look at it this way: One door closes... another one opens. AND... as an added feature... the little window of opportunity shows some light. Amen to that.